Misunderstanding of what family is.....

So for the past year she has been living in her mom's basement.  It is a beautiful basement, all finished with burber carpet and a kitchen was built into it and she has a separate bedroom from the main space.  She has loved this apartment, it has almost been like a safe haven for her.  She has been able to leave her dog in the house with no concerns and she has been able to come and go as she pleases and have no worries.  Until recently, when she decided that she wanted her own place.

Her mom has helped her through some major life altering times, a pregnancy at an early age, a medical condition that temporarily debilatated her, a few hellish boyfriends, and some emotional ups and downs.  Her mom almost having enough is very understandable, she feels sorry for all the horrible things she has put her mother through, however, she is ready to get out on her own and to finally make something of her life.

Her career is going great!  She has a secure fantastic job that she loves to do and does not even really call it work!  She has great friends in her life, she has a great pet, her car works, her health is good, and she has recently redeveloped a good relationship with her son!

Family, family is supposed to be your supporter, your number one fan, to help you when you need help and accept you for who you are.  She thought that for most of her life she had that, until recently.

When she was accused of being abusive to her family and for wanting a free ride!  So not true, complete opposite of it all.  For a good chunk of her life she has let people treat her poorly, abuse her, and has done "almost" everything that she was asked to do.  She has lived in a basement for two years with no natural sunlight.  She is tired of people taking advantage and has decided to spread her wings for one last final time, to take all the lessons that she has learned over the past 10 years and start fresh.

Her heart is broken, the one person that she adores, idolizes, and worships, just recently called her an abuser.  Why?  because she wants to spread her wings and get on her own and postpone some financial obligations.  Is family not supposed to understand how she is feeling and realize that this move will not only be good for her but for everyone?

A fresh start, all new furniture, all new hopes and dreams.  A new environment where she can learn to be herself again and not a stepping stone for others.  She has been naive and she has allowed people to use her, well not anymore, she is a new person!

She will show everyone that she needs NO ONES help, she can do this on her own!  This will be similar to a roller coaster, ups and downs, ins and outs, this is HER LIFE!

Look out world, it's gonna be one HELL of a ride!

People & Confusions

So today I went to see a very good friend in Guelph and when I got there I found where I was going and made a pit stop at Wendy's.  So I turned around to back track one block and as I turned around I was directly behind this cop car.  So, here I sit, safety belt on, radio on, singing away, and thinking how nice of a town Guelph is and that I would like to learn more about it and I see this woman that I presume was drunk taking a dump on this patch of grass on the corner.  I would imagine that at the same time that I saw this woman the cop opened the passenger door and this big cop started to approach her.  Now the funny thing was that she did not see the cop and she was not entirely bent over in a squat position, she was semi squat and by the looks of it pushing the poop out!  What I thought she was standing on was a patch of grass that was on the corner of the gas station, however, in fact it was the corner of the fire station!

Like come on, if she was sober did she not have the common thought of holding it two more seconds to get to Wendy's.  Or even could she not have gone into the fire hall and asked the hotties to use the bathroom?  If she was drunk, well, that's a different story!  Perhaps there was some mental issues, but in realty I think she was just plain old waste, blitzed, drunk!

Do people really think sober or drunk that they can get away with this?  Have you ever been wasted so much that you have no concept of what your doing?  I have maybe been close to that but seriously, pulling my pants down on a patch of grass on the fire station parking lot is just, hum...... ABSURD!

Now, not that I am a big fan, but lately I have been extremely impressed with the PoPo because I have seen some impressive stuff, so therefore, I feel sorry for the cop that has to arrest this person!  Like having to pull up her pants or even ask her to wipe her butt on the side of the road!  Do cops actually have the decency to ask them to do that or do they just shove them into the cruiser.

I guess some people just never learn!

Until next time,
Jewellz

Men & Confusion

So here I am a single 30 year old lady, that in my opinion is pretty frickin fantastic!  I have a great job that I am good at, I drive a nice car, have a great place to live (ya ya I know with the parents, but it's cheap!) and I have a great outlook on life and a wicked personality!   I am funny, smart, sexy, and I love life!  I love all things but I am gonna spare the details because frankly it's kinda boring!

There are many things that I am gonna hopefully blog about in the future and alot of them are gonna be confusions about life.  Anyone that has feedback, please leave it as I think it's important to hear what kind of thoughts people have.

My first confusion is about men.  So I am gonna pretty much ramble on about how and why I am confused about men.  Maybe, feed back will do me good.  Don't hold back now.....K?
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I do not understand men, here they roam around the earth and they work (the good ones anyways), they drink, they sleep, they fart, and they drive us women batty!  WHY do these men act like such baboons?  What are they all so confused about us women? We are a simple breed!

Ya see, men, they go for these cheap and easy chicks to get a piece of ass.  I mean come on, I apologize in advance to all the women that I am probably going to offend but this is how I feel.  These are the women that go to the bar every Friday and Saturday night (I have been there) and wear practically nothing and they drink and drink and drink and think that when they are drunk that it is completely sexy to throw your arms up in the air and woot woot!  (I admit, I am guilty!) but more importantly I am talking about these chicks that obviously looking to pick up.  The crazy thing is that these chicks are like fisherman, they dangle their bait (which is generally tits) and the men jump on them.....not jump on the tits but they gravitate to them.  I DON'T GET IT!

I work in health care and I take care of alot of seniors both men and women and I can honestly say that I am a romantic.  I hear these stories about men in the earlier years that that pursue the women and it is seriously out of a romance novel.  The men are men.  Not boys.  The men that are in their 30s and younger are boys.  They think that when you pull their finger and they fart that it is funny.  It's not, IT'S RETARDED AND DISGUSTING!!!!

I guess the more that I type this blog I am getting some answers, all these men are married and have been since kindergarten almost! lol!

The way I figure it is this....it's very simple.   Boys, Guys, & Men that are out there, give the girls that wear all their clothes a chance!  Just because we have more clothes on than most women that are hittin the bar scene means nothing!  We like sex just as much as the next dingbat!  Except the sex is gonna be a 1000% times better!  Because the ladies that keep their clothes on and are not slutty make better lovers.

Also, for the final thought!

Wake up guys, you are being leaded down a path of disaster by having one night stands with sluts!  It's the sluts that give the good girls a bad rep!  To the girls that keep their clothes on at a bar, Koodoos to you!  Don't fall into the slut trap.  Let the men learn that us fully dressed women are oober SEXY!

Until next time,
Jewellz

50 Fun things to do at a Grocery store

1. Ask the produce manager if he happens to have any fresh Oompah Loompah fruit


2. While holding a cantaloupe directly in front of your chest, squeeze it and smile dreamily.


3. Every time you turn the corner with your shopping cart, shout “Wheeeeeeeeeeeee!”


4. Go up to the manager and tell him or her that you’ve lost your mommy.


5. While waiting in line at the checkout, juggle some lemons.


6. Tiptoe stealthily up and down the aisles – and around corners – with a magnifying glass.



8. After visiting the bakery section, go up and down the aisles exclaiming, “My buns are squishy!”


9. While arguing with an invisible friend, you proceed to play tug-of-war over an item.


10. Hold your nose while standing in line at the meat department.


11. Ask the deli clerk how much potato salad it would take for two people to comfortably wrestle in.


12. Fake cell phone conversation: “Doctor, I couldn’t possibly have malaria. That was weeks ago!”


13. Start doing a river dance in front of the corned beef


14. Tell the checkout cashier that you have to hurry, or your spaceship will leave without you.


15. Tell the checkout bagger that you knew him in a former life, and ask why he left without a note.


16. Ask someone if they saw your picture in the post office and remark that it was one of your 
best.


17. On a hot summer day, ask the manager if someone can help you clean the snow from your car.


18. Tell a customer that you’re from the future and have just zapped back for an historic 
vacation.


19. Walk around holding a copy of the Scarlet Letter while sporting a big red “A”.


20. Ask a clerk if you can test several types of deodorant before making a decision to buy one.


21. Using a stethoscope, listen intently to several coconuts in the produce aisle.


22. Tell one of the lobsters that you’ve brought the potion to turn him back into a man.


23. Run up to the fresh vegetables in the produce aisle and yell, “Boo!”


24. Play peek-a-boo with a little old lady while waiting in the checkout line.


25. When the clerk in the deli asks for your order, mime it.


26. Walk around smoking an invisible cigarette – and get great satisfaction from it.


27. Pretend to cook a meal using the pots and pans in the housewares aisle.


28. Bring a concealed whoopie cushion with you and activate it every couple of minutes.


29. Ask if anyone has seen your pet snake – he was just in your pocket a minute ago.


30. While waiting in the deli line, pretend to read an invisible book – be sure to turn the pages.


31. Hold up a can of bug spray and ask someone what type of cracker would go best with it.


32. Shout out, “OK, who squeezed my melons?!”


33. If you see someone offering samples, keep circling like a shark and snatch snacks at each 
pass.


34. Invite other customers to join you in a game of limbo using a pepperoni stick.


35. Go up to a dead fish on ice, sob and say, “We were supposed to be married on Saturday!”


36. In the middle of one of the aisles, scream, “Food fight!”


37. Stand in front of the ice cream freezer, look intently at it, and scream intermittently.


38. Squirm around a lot and shout, “Quick – where’s the hemorrhoid cream?”


39. Pick up bananas at random; act as though you’re on the phone and say, “Sorry, wrong 
number!”


40. Point accusingly at one of the cucumbers and say, “I thought I told you to wait in the car!”


41. Holding a flea collar, ask a clerk how you get the flea to hold still so that you can put it on 
him.


42. Look for someone holding a jar of honey, and then explain that this is actually bee vomit.


43. Every time you pass a particular type of meat, imitate the sound of the animal.


44. Walk down the aisles like a turkey, while opening your eyes as wide as physically possible.


45. As you pass the lettuce, turn toward it, fold your arms and say, “You’re out of your head!”


46. Pick up a jar of pickled pig’s feet and – in a distraught voice – say, “Oh, no! It’s Babe!”


47. As you pass people in the aisles, look startled and run in the opposite direction.


48. Bring a ventriloquist dummy and argue about what to buy for dinner as you go through the 
store.


49. Tell the produce clerk that the bananas are fighting again, and that they’re all getting bruised.


50. Tell the manager to call for a clean-up in the laxative aisle.

Friday Night!

Its been a long day! starting off with a continual battle with some bitch that has ruined my life, or so it seems! my day has been absolutely one of the worst days possible! From problems with patients and delays in schedules and staffing issues.  I am tired and cranky and thirsty and hungry......I come home to an empty house...ahhhhh my house.....my safety net!  Lights on, warmth, and comfort.  I am greeted by my Jack that is so over the moon to see me walk through the door..... his little stubby tail waggin as fast as it can and him jumping in the air to get petted and cookies thrown his way.....My buddy rings the door bell and we change and head out to the local watering hole!

As we are driving there we are cranking the tunes to Marky Mark and the Funky Bunches Good Vibrations and singing at the top of our lungs and laughing at how old skool it is to listen to the good ole tunes.  As we turn the corner to our destination, the parking lot is empty and the bar looks dead from the outside looking in.....oh great....one of two things, the bar is dead or it is closed......cool, its very quiet in the bar with the exception of a few Canadian Idols that are pumpin the jams to a karaoke machine! Sweet......crappy sounding people that try their darnedest to sing like the pros! 

We go in and put a food order in.....two chickys lookin for fattening foods.....Wings, fries and beer! LOVE IT!  We find a table, at first pick under the speaker.....wise choice.....move to a table on the opposite room where its not so freakin loud and we can pretend to hear what each other is saying.  

So the Dj dude is trying his hardest to get singers to come up and belt out some tunes but is totally unsuccessful as there is aprox. 30 people in the bar and half are feelin no pain by 10:30pm, so he gets up and sings a few songs, which I am hoping is to turn people off so that they will get up! Well guess what........it worked! 

There is a lady that sings and she well.....she well.......sucked! lol but koodoos for gettin up there! if she had fun.....who cares right!  Well as we hoover the wings and fries and beer down more ladies start to come in!  They are all polished up and looking nice and I would say that they are there to pick up! 

So the newest lady in the bar gets up to sing.....now in a bar that that ratio of men to women surprisingly is higher, the song she sings is "stroke it" and let me tell ya.....no pun intended.....she sucked!  I mean come on.....you suck and you have a mouth like a trucker and the bar is practically empty.....lol why of all songs this one?  looking for attention are we?

So for the hour that we were in the bar with this woman, she proceeds to talk to the bar through the mic and start a stand up routine.....she tells this joke.....

"a man walks into the bank with a gun, he says if anyone looks at me I will kill them.  So as he finishes up robbing the bank he notices that a man is looking at him so he states that he has to kill him as he now can identify him and bang he shoots him.  So as he is walking out he asks if anyone else has looked at him and this woman raises her hand and says, I have not looked at you but my husband has!"

Lol......so after this stand up comedy routine she proceeds to sing Janis Joplin - take another little peice of my heart......OUCH Janis Joplin is rolling over in her grave! 

Back to my quiet house, to my security blanket! To my Jack loving every second that I am home, throwing the ball for him......over and over and over again! lol! 

Well......good night kids! 

Until next time, 

Jewellz

Down and out

Here it is March 1, 2010 and I am sitting at my computer wondering why I am here.  I mean I know that I am a good person and that I have a lot to offer to people but I cannot figure out why people seem to put me down, belittle me, make me feel bad, hurt me, or even sometimes why I cannot feel that I am good enough for people.

I just feel most days that I am not good enough for the world, now some people might say to me that I am a whiner and I am just looking for attention and to be honest that is not it at all!  I mean I am completely fine to be on my own and it does get lonely but that is just how most days I feel.

Let's back track a little bit.  My sons father is double my age and he is such a user and a loser that I fell into his loser trap.  He had put me down so much that I was at a low so bad I believed that I was a mental person.  He hit me and he verbally, emotionally, sexually, and financially abused me.  It's weird because when you are not directly involved in that situation you think "just leave him".  Now, I know that this was 10 years ago when I was in this relationship and that I should be over it and for the most part I am except for one situation which I choose not to talk about.   He also took my son from me and I feel so incomplete without my son.  I feel like a huge failure because his father does not encourage our relationship and to be honest I do not think that my son wants to be with me.

Then we move over to Neil.  I loved him I really loved him and when I look back I really don't know why because it was all about him.  Everything.  Never once did he have anything positive to say to me.  never.  I supported him and I paid for everything and he just continued to use me over and over and over again.

Now, here I have the opportunity to meet someone I have known all my life and I pushed him away.  I told him not to come visit me, to leave me alone.  I know that he would be a good friend but I just want so much more than a friend.  I want to have some fun.  I want to explore him and him to explore me but we are at so different parts of our lives I often wonder how it would ever fit or how we would ever be compatible.

How can anyone fall in love with someone that lives with mommy and lives pay check to pay check?  How can anyone love someone that is over weight and feels down about themselves almost everyday.  How can I possibly love someone if I don't love myself?  Why do I not love myself? because of the situation that I am in.

Thank you Neil for putting me in debt and making me feel like such a failure for a second time!  Thank you Wayne for abusing me so much that I am having a hard time trusting a man.

To everyone that is hurting me, please, I  beg of you, STOP!

To the man that I have pushed away, I am so sorry.  I do care a great deal for you and I do want something to develop and to be your friend and more, but understand that I am not good enough for you and you deserve so much more than me.

To my friends, I just need space, just let me be for now and I will get over this hurdle eventually!

Until next time,
Jewellz

High School behaviors

Well, the other day I revolted back to high school and to be honest reflecting back, I feel silly!  However, I feel that the situation did get out of hand and it could have been handled differently but it is now in the past.

This is what I know:
My good friend and her boyfriend broke up two months or so ago and it was because their lives were on such different paths.  He was unemployed and had some issues and she is employed and is a great catch.  Now, during the relationship she was the bread winner and this boyfriend allowed it and abused the privlidges of being a good boyfriend and he took advantage of her.  Well, this girl finally opened her eyes and realized that she was being shit on and decided that a break would be best.  So the girl states that they are going to remain friends but at most times the friendships never last, but koodoos if it works!  So as time goes on the guy messages me and asks me all of these questions about her and proceeds to go onto saying that it was all her fault and blah blah blah and I advised him to give her her space and maybe down the road things will work out.  He WAS a really nice guy and I thought that maybe over time it would resolve itself.  WELL.....then yesterday happened!

A post was put on facebook by the girl and she had mentioned that she was yet again hurt and we had talked about it and on the post I had said look at the source.  Well it was not until he he replied with a hasty comment that I decided that I should let him know that what he is doing wrong.  And, that is where it all began!

So, he and I went back and forth over aprox. 39 - 40 posts about their relationship.  That was a mistake because it turned out that he started to bash me!  LOL I think this is kinda humorous because never once did I instigate a verbal attack towards him but merely stated a fact that perhaps he should keep his mouth shut because he knows dam well that what he is saying is a farce.  All in all, one of his friends decided to send a letter to the guy, the girl, and moi.  In the letter it stated that he should pretty much get a life and get over it!

The reason for this post today is because I revolted back to high school! I  hated high school!  I HATE drama!  The problem that I have is that women that are shy and timid and too afraid to stand up for themselves often need someone to stick up for them, that is what I did!  I stood up for someone that needed standing up for!  He was outright lying about everything he had said on facebook and to her friends on her wall.

My last and final point is that I am me, I am outspoken and I stand up for my friends and if they choose to go back to losers or befriend them than that is fine, but realize that these men that treat women like shit deserve to be castrated!  I have been hurt by men over and over again and it is a pattern.  I am FINALLY breaking through my pattern, I DO NOT NEED A MAN THAT BAD TO BE ABUSED!

To this girl, I know you will read this.

I love you! you are one of my best friends! I think you deserve better than him! If you choose to be with him, go for it, DO NOT INCLUDE ME IN YOUR PLANS!  He is an asshole that hits below the belt and he is a loser and always will be!  If you want to be his friend that is fine, but realize that he will continue to hurt you over and over and over again and you deserve so much more than that!   You are a beautiful person on the inside and out and I have a hard time seeing you get hurt.

Anyone this is my friend knows that I am a passionate person and I have a hard time with hurt!  I love ALL of my friends and I may not be in your face all the time hanging out and what not but I am ALWAYS on the other end of the phone and will ALWAYS drive a million miles to help out.  And there will be times that I get fucked, well so be it! I know in my heart that I have done the right thing!

Until next time,
Jewellz